Hello, hello. It's been a while since I've last posted. I'm going to start posting on a daily basis.
What will I be posting you ask? Well, my poker results for one. I've withdrew everything but 10 bucks on my stars account. I'm not sure if I'm good anymore, so I'm going to force myself to play low stakes, build a bankroll, and see if I'm a winner. I'll be playing cash and tournaments, but mainly tournaments. At the end of each day, or two days I'll post my results. Graphs, from HEM, anything I can think off.
Along with that, I have slightly ballooned in weight again. Starting Thursday I'm going to seriously concentrate on getting healthy, getting in shape, and looking good. I'll post those updates as well.
With that, back to pokerz!
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Sunday, September 12, 2010
ADDED GAMES!
Denver +3, -110 @ Jacksonville
Dallas @ Washington +3.5, -120
San Diego @ Kansas City +4.5, -110
Dallas @ Washington +3.5, -120
San Diego @ Kansas City +4.5, -110
NFL PLAYS!
Ravens/Jets under 35.5 pts
Browns/Bucs over 37 pts
Packers/Iggles over 47.5 pts
SF 49ers -3 vs Seattle
Browns/Bucs over 37 pts
Packers/Iggles over 47.5 pts
SF 49ers -3 vs Seattle
Monday, August 30, 2010
2010 WASHINGTON REDSKINS
In the past five seasons the Washington Redskins have gone 4-12, 8-8, 9-7, 5-11, and 10-6 respectively. They have gone through two coaches. One a hall of fame coach who was past his prime in Joe Gibbs and a neophyte who was in over his head in Jim Zorn. What has changed since that point? Well for one, Gibbs has been retired for two years and Zorn is back to coaching quarterbacks in Baltimore. The question is, will they be able to win more then 7.5 games. Yes, they will.
What is the main reason for change you ask, well I will tell you, Mike Shanahan and Bruce Allen. Gone are the days of free wheeling and dealing of what I like to affectionately call Synerrato. Dan Snyder and Vinney Cerrato will no longer bring in high priced free agents who are past their prime or who are over paid malcontents. No more Adam Archuleta or Jeff George. Gone are the days of bringing in Bruce Smith, Mark Carrier, and Deon Sanders. No more winning the off season, they will now start taking down the regular season. The Washington Redskins only have one last piece of that previous regime and even though he is an over paid malcontent he will make a major impact on the Redskins defense. I'm speaking of Albert Haynesworth. While he started off training camp the worst way he possibly could he has finally made up with the head coach. This is a good sign for fans of the team. While he may be a self serving jerk Albert even at his worst last year made a noticeable impact on the defense. He helped Andre Carter accomplish a career year with 11 sacks. He also had a noticeable effect on the Redskins run defense. When Albert was on the field the Redskins allowed a nice 3.1 yard per carry average. Without him they averaged over 5 yards per carry. Simply put, the Redskins are better with Albert on the field.
Along with the change of no longer having a in over his head head coach, they have also brought along a tremendous offensive coordinator in Kyle Shanahan. Last year while with the Houston Texans Kyle led Houston's offense to a number four ranking for total yards per game. They were also number one in the NFL in passing yards per game. I think we can all say this is the area where the Redskins need to improve in the most. Gone are the days of bad play calling of Jim Zorn. The Redskins now have professional coaches who know how to win super bowls in this era.
Along with the improvement in coaching the Redskins have dramatically improved the offensive talent. They have brought into two perennial pro bowl players in Donovan Mcnabb who has hall of fame worthy numbers, and offensive tackle beast Jamal Brown from the super bowl champions. With the addition of Artist Hicks to hold steady in the guard position and left tackle wunderkind Trent Williams they have revamped the two most glaring needs of the Redskins, offensive line and quarterback. Some naysayers will point to the lack of talent at wide receiver which they say will hinder the progress of the team. I disagree. I point to Donovan Mcnabb's past years with the likes of Freddie Mitchell and Todd Pinkston. If the past has taught us anything it's that Donovan's favorite target is and almost always is the tight end. See Brent Celek and LJ Smith. Oddly enough that just so happens to be were the Redskins have the most offensive talent with Chris Cooley and past USC standout Fred Davis. I will also point to Mike Shanahan's success in the past with tight ends see Shannon Sharpe and Tony Scheffler. Overall the offense will be vastly improved compared to previous years.
This year the Redskins will be sporting a brand new 3-4 defense. Some have asked why they have made the switch since it appears their personnel fit more of the 4-3 variety. Jim Haslett has been quoted saying that on defense you build around your best player, and that happens to be Brian Orakpo. In last years defense the 4-3, Brian rushed the quarterback less the 500 times yet he still recorded 11 sacks. In this more attacking style of defense, they say his quarterback rushes should more then double that thus resulting in a higher sack total. It is also to be noted that during this preseason the Redskins have been a much more of a ball hawking team. This is something that Haslett has the team practicing every day. While they have been in the top 10 in defense the past couple years they have never created the turnovers that top teams seem to do. This will change under Haslett.
Moving onto special teams. Bye bye Antwan Randle-El. Gone are the days of your cloud of dust and move no where punt returns. I don't think I have ever seen so many fair catches in my entire life. In comes 5-8 speedster Brandon Banks. He already has a punt return for ta touchdown this preseason. The Redskins with Devin Thomas returning kick offs and Banks, Hall, Moss, platooning on the punt returns, special teams might actually be dangerous this year. The Redskins also for the first time in years now have a stable kicker in Grahm Gano. This is also a major improvement. So no more trading back and forth with the Cowboys.
Onto the final review of the schedule. I think you have 4 wins between St. Louis, Detroit, Jax, and Tampa Bay. While the rest of the schedule is tough considering it is the NFC east, if they can at least go .500 out of the final 12 games I think you have a 10-6 win team or 8-8 at worst.
The value is over 7.5 wins my friends.
What is the main reason for change you ask, well I will tell you, Mike Shanahan and Bruce Allen. Gone are the days of free wheeling and dealing of what I like to affectionately call Synerrato. Dan Snyder and Vinney Cerrato will no longer bring in high priced free agents who are past their prime or who are over paid malcontents. No more Adam Archuleta or Jeff George. Gone are the days of bringing in Bruce Smith, Mark Carrier, and Deon Sanders. No more winning the off season, they will now start taking down the regular season. The Washington Redskins only have one last piece of that previous regime and even though he is an over paid malcontent he will make a major impact on the Redskins defense. I'm speaking of Albert Haynesworth. While he started off training camp the worst way he possibly could he has finally made up with the head coach. This is a good sign for fans of the team. While he may be a self serving jerk Albert even at his worst last year made a noticeable impact on the defense. He helped Andre Carter accomplish a career year with 11 sacks. He also had a noticeable effect on the Redskins run defense. When Albert was on the field the Redskins allowed a nice 3.1 yard per carry average. Without him they averaged over 5 yards per carry. Simply put, the Redskins are better with Albert on the field.
Along with the change of no longer having a in over his head head coach, they have also brought along a tremendous offensive coordinator in Kyle Shanahan. Last year while with the Houston Texans Kyle led Houston's offense to a number four ranking for total yards per game. They were also number one in the NFL in passing yards per game. I think we can all say this is the area where the Redskins need to improve in the most. Gone are the days of bad play calling of Jim Zorn. The Redskins now have professional coaches who know how to win super bowls in this era.
Along with the improvement in coaching the Redskins have dramatically improved the offensive talent. They have brought into two perennial pro bowl players in Donovan Mcnabb who has hall of fame worthy numbers, and offensive tackle beast Jamal Brown from the super bowl champions. With the addition of Artist Hicks to hold steady in the guard position and left tackle wunderkind Trent Williams they have revamped the two most glaring needs of the Redskins, offensive line and quarterback. Some naysayers will point to the lack of talent at wide receiver which they say will hinder the progress of the team. I disagree. I point to Donovan Mcnabb's past years with the likes of Freddie Mitchell and Todd Pinkston. If the past has taught us anything it's that Donovan's favorite target is and almost always is the tight end. See Brent Celek and LJ Smith. Oddly enough that just so happens to be were the Redskins have the most offensive talent with Chris Cooley and past USC standout Fred Davis. I will also point to Mike Shanahan's success in the past with tight ends see Shannon Sharpe and Tony Scheffler. Overall the offense will be vastly improved compared to previous years.
This year the Redskins will be sporting a brand new 3-4 defense. Some have asked why they have made the switch since it appears their personnel fit more of the 4-3 variety. Jim Haslett has been quoted saying that on defense you build around your best player, and that happens to be Brian Orakpo. In last years defense the 4-3, Brian rushed the quarterback less the 500 times yet he still recorded 11 sacks. In this more attacking style of defense, they say his quarterback rushes should more then double that thus resulting in a higher sack total. It is also to be noted that during this preseason the Redskins have been a much more of a ball hawking team. This is something that Haslett has the team practicing every day. While they have been in the top 10 in defense the past couple years they have never created the turnovers that top teams seem to do. This will change under Haslett.
Moving onto special teams. Bye bye Antwan Randle-El. Gone are the days of your cloud of dust and move no where punt returns. I don't think I have ever seen so many fair catches in my entire life. In comes 5-8 speedster Brandon Banks. He already has a punt return for ta touchdown this preseason. The Redskins with Devin Thomas returning kick offs and Banks, Hall, Moss, platooning on the punt returns, special teams might actually be dangerous this year. The Redskins also for the first time in years now have a stable kicker in Grahm Gano. This is also a major improvement. So no more trading back and forth with the Cowboys.
Onto the final review of the schedule. I think you have 4 wins between St. Louis, Detroit, Jax, and Tampa Bay. While the rest of the schedule is tough considering it is the NFC east, if they can at least go .500 out of the final 12 games I think you have a 10-6 win team or 8-8 at worst.
The value is over 7.5 wins my friends.
Friday, August 27, 2010
GIANTS VS RAVENS(-4)
On August 28th the New York football Giants head into M & T bank stadium to face off against the Baltimore Ravens. Kickoff occurs at 7:30PM est. As of right now the line is Ravens -4 (-110). Take the Ravens.
The first question to ask when evaluating a NFL preseason game is how long will the starters play. According to the Ravens website they plan to play some starters into the third quarter. Especially the offensive line. While the quarterback and others will at least play a half. This is good considering the strongest point the Giants have are their defensive line front four. How long the giants play will be another question all together. A lot of Giants starters are just coming off injuries. Their two starting guards are just coming off injuries. Manning is healing from a 3 inch gash he received two weeks ago. Manning is quoted in ESPN saying he will play but he just isn't sure for how long. I think it's safe to say that some of the important pieces of the Giants offensive unit will not be playing the standard amount of time compared to most NFL teams in a third preseason game. Another notable injury for the Giants is corner Arron Ross, he will also be out. It is also important to note the back ups. The edge goes to the Ravens. The difference between Marc Bulger and Troy Smith compared Sorgi and Bomar is huge. Bulger behind the Ravens offensive line facing the Giants second team will be more than effective.
Defensively at this moment the only risk the Ravens show at this point are their defensive backs. With Foxworth and Reed out it exposes a problem for them. Will Manning be able to take advantage of this? Yes, he will. The question is, how long will Manning play? I speculate not long. The ravens like to blitz. As shown when they played the Redskins, they send quite a few exotic blitzes during the preseason. Does Tom Coughlin want to risk his season on this game? I don't think so. Once Manning leaves the game Sorgi and Bomar won't be able to take advantage of this issue. They we will knocked down and hassled all game.
Will the Giants defense be able to stop the Ravens? I don't think so. In the Giants first game they allowed 16 points versus the Jets. The Jets do not have an effective offense. Clemens and O'Connell were pretty successful against the Giants D despite having two turnovers. They led the Jets to 3 field goals. It is safe to say Bulger and Smith will do better. Not to mention the Ravens offense is pretty dynamic with Ray Rice and the new additions of Anquan Bolden and Donte Stallworth. Joe Flacco should thrive in the first half.
Last thing one should consider before making a judgment on a game is the weather. Will the weather affect the outcome of the game? I don't think so. Tomorrow it should be nice and warm with clear skies. Great football weather.
Consider tomorrow a Ravens win. After the final gun the Ravens should take out the Giants by a reasonable amount. Make the bet gentleman and collect the cash.
The first question to ask when evaluating a NFL preseason game is how long will the starters play. According to the Ravens website they plan to play some starters into the third quarter. Especially the offensive line. While the quarterback and others will at least play a half. This is good considering the strongest point the Giants have are their defensive line front four. How long the giants play will be another question all together. A lot of Giants starters are just coming off injuries. Their two starting guards are just coming off injuries. Manning is healing from a 3 inch gash he received two weeks ago. Manning is quoted in ESPN saying he will play but he just isn't sure for how long. I think it's safe to say that some of the important pieces of the Giants offensive unit will not be playing the standard amount of time compared to most NFL teams in a third preseason game. Another notable injury for the Giants is corner Arron Ross, he will also be out. It is also important to note the back ups. The edge goes to the Ravens. The difference between Marc Bulger and Troy Smith compared Sorgi and Bomar is huge. Bulger behind the Ravens offensive line facing the Giants second team will be more than effective.
Defensively at this moment the only risk the Ravens show at this point are their defensive backs. With Foxworth and Reed out it exposes a problem for them. Will Manning be able to take advantage of this? Yes, he will. The question is, how long will Manning play? I speculate not long. The ravens like to blitz. As shown when they played the Redskins, they send quite a few exotic blitzes during the preseason. Does Tom Coughlin want to risk his season on this game? I don't think so. Once Manning leaves the game Sorgi and Bomar won't be able to take advantage of this issue. They we will knocked down and hassled all game.
Will the Giants defense be able to stop the Ravens? I don't think so. In the Giants first game they allowed 16 points versus the Jets. The Jets do not have an effective offense. Clemens and O'Connell were pretty successful against the Giants D despite having two turnovers. They led the Jets to 3 field goals. It is safe to say Bulger and Smith will do better. Not to mention the Ravens offense is pretty dynamic with Ray Rice and the new additions of Anquan Bolden and Donte Stallworth. Joe Flacco should thrive in the first half.
Last thing one should consider before making a judgment on a game is the weather. Will the weather affect the outcome of the game? I don't think so. Tomorrow it should be nice and warm with clear skies. Great football weather.
Consider tomorrow a Ravens win. After the final gun the Ravens should take out the Giants by a reasonable amount. Make the bet gentleman and collect the cash.
ANALYSIS YANKEES/CHISOX
On August 28th at 8:10 PM EST the bronx bombers head into the unfriendly confines of US Cellular field to face White Sox of Chicago. It will be a pitching match up between AJ Burnett and Freddy Garcia. It will be the fourth time these two teams have met up this year.
The total at the moment is over 10 even or you can take the under at -120. In three games this season vs the Chicago White Sox the New York Yankees have averaged eight runs a game. Scoring twelve, six, and six respectively. While the Chicago White Sox have scored three, seven, and four coming in at 4.6 runs a game. In the three years previous they have played seventeen games where they scored less then ten runs only 6 times. AJ Burnett pitched one of those meetings last year and only lasted 4.2 innings and the Yanks allowed fourteen runs that particular game. Garcia has pitched twice in the past two years against the Yanks lasting six innings in both games. The White Sox allowed six and eight runs respectively in those two games. Overall this year when Garcia and Burnett has taken the mound this season the over has come through twenty-seven out of forty-seven times for 57%. In the past ten games the yanks have gone over ten runs five times while the White Sox have gone over ten seven times. In both games Garcia pitched the game went over ten runs. In the one game Burnett pitched for the Yanks he played Seattle. He pitched 7 innings and the Yanks lost 6-0. I think it's fair to say Seattle has a fairly limited offense.
For the overall season both teams are up on the over. The Yankees are 63-57-7 and the Chicago White Sox are 63-59-4.
Another aspect to note is the park factor. Is US Cellular field a hitters ball park? ESPN says so. According to their park factor stat ((homeRS + homeRA)/(homeG)) / ((roadRS + roadRA)/(roadG)) they rank 5th out of all thirty MLB fields. They come in at 1.067.
Some will note that Alex Rodriquez is out. That is not a factor. In the past four games without Alex Rodriguez they have averaged 6.5 runs per game. They have done extremely well with out him this year.
Moving onto injuries. It should be noted that each team has key relievers on the DL. Marte and Aceves are out for the Yankees while pivotal relief pitchers Thorton and Putz are out for the White Sox. Both Thorton and Putz had eaten up some innings for the White Sox and are a key loss for the team.
Another positive note is that the weather is looking nice and good for tomorrow. With a high of 82 degrees and a low of 65 degrees. It is supposed to be sunny and clear with a high humidity. Good baseball weather. That bats will be warm. Hot and humid, the ball will travel far. They also don't call it the windy city for nothing.
Another positive note is that both teams are coming off a day off. They should be refreshed. In Yankee and White Sox games ten runs have been scored after a day off fifth-teen out of thirty games. While the stat is only 50% it is noted that both teams scoring is up on games after a day off.
After reviewing all of these statistics I think the clear play is the over. It should easily come through over 50% of the time. Everything points to it. Make the bet and collect the cash.
The total at the moment is over 10 even or you can take the under at -120. In three games this season vs the Chicago White Sox the New York Yankees have averaged eight runs a game. Scoring twelve, six, and six respectively. While the Chicago White Sox have scored three, seven, and four coming in at 4.6 runs a game. In the three years previous they have played seventeen games where they scored less then ten runs only 6 times. AJ Burnett pitched one of those meetings last year and only lasted 4.2 innings and the Yanks allowed fourteen runs that particular game. Garcia has pitched twice in the past two years against the Yanks lasting six innings in both games. The White Sox allowed six and eight runs respectively in those two games. Overall this year when Garcia and Burnett has taken the mound this season the over has come through twenty-seven out of forty-seven times for 57%. In the past ten games the yanks have gone over ten runs five times while the White Sox have gone over ten seven times. In both games Garcia pitched the game went over ten runs. In the one game Burnett pitched for the Yanks he played Seattle. He pitched 7 innings and the Yanks lost 6-0. I think it's fair to say Seattle has a fairly limited offense.
For the overall season both teams are up on the over. The Yankees are 63-57-7 and the Chicago White Sox are 63-59-4.
Another aspect to note is the park factor. Is US Cellular field a hitters ball park? ESPN says so. According to their park factor stat ((homeRS + homeRA)/(homeG)) / ((roadRS + roadRA)/(roadG)) they rank 5th out of all thirty MLB fields. They come in at 1.067.
Some will note that Alex Rodriquez is out. That is not a factor. In the past four games without Alex Rodriguez they have averaged 6.5 runs per game. They have done extremely well with out him this year.
Moving onto injuries. It should be noted that each team has key relievers on the DL. Marte and Aceves are out for the Yankees while pivotal relief pitchers Thorton and Putz are out for the White Sox. Both Thorton and Putz had eaten up some innings for the White Sox and are a key loss for the team.
Another positive note is that the weather is looking nice and good for tomorrow. With a high of 82 degrees and a low of 65 degrees. It is supposed to be sunny and clear with a high humidity. Good baseball weather. That bats will be warm. Hot and humid, the ball will travel far. They also don't call it the windy city for nothing.
Another positive note is that both teams are coming off a day off. They should be refreshed. In Yankee and White Sox games ten runs have been scored after a day off fifth-teen out of thirty games. While the stat is only 50% it is noted that both teams scoring is up on games after a day off.
After reviewing all of these statistics I think the clear play is the over. It should easily come through over 50% of the time. Everything points to it. Make the bet and collect the cash.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
WNBA PLAYS!
1st Quarters
• NEW YORK (+1.5) • WASH 1Q
• CHICAGO (-0.5) • CONN 1Q
• OVER (37.5) • INDY/SAS 1Q
• PHOENIX (-0.5) • SEA 1Q
• UNDER (38) • MINN/LAS 1Q
• NEW YORK (+1.5) • WASH 1Q
• CHICAGO (-0.5) • CONN 1Q
• OVER (37.5) • INDY/SAS 1Q
• PHOENIX (-0.5) • SEA 1Q
• UNDER (38) • MINN/LAS 1Q
Thursday, August 19, 2010
THE WORD
The word is that Indy game through. 7-1 so far to start off the season so far. Not to bad. Come on no scoring Pats Falcons!
CORRECTION
I misread a line online. No Atl spread play just the under. I did add on to the indy over because it got moved down to 32 pts.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Monday, August 16, 2010
WHY I HATE PEOPLE.....
Man I hate America. That's right, I said it, I'm here to represent it. You see stupid republicans, they want their guns. Can't fuck with that second amendment. Gotta have muh guns. I like guns cause they go boom, har har. Stupid fucks. Now you idiots like to say you love America, we are the home of the free, and brave and shit like that. We love the constitution. America is free. Like we are the only free nation in the world. Idiots. Well here is the thing you gun toting, god clinging retards. In the Constitution their is this thing called amendment fucking number 1. Freedom of religion. Yeah, any dip shit can worship whatever fake deity they want. Whoop de fucking do. Well that means, if folks want to be Muslim, then GOD FUCKING BLESS. That also means if they want to build a Mosque, community center, or whatever the fuck it is, they can build it as long as they have the means. It's the way shit works, here in America. So grab a straw and suck it the fuck up.
Last but not least, I hope one of you idiots tells me I'm some anti patriot so I can fucking punch you in the throat.
Last but not least, I hope one of you idiots tells me I'm some anti patriot so I can fucking punch you in the throat.
WHAT YAH GONNA DO???
When hulkamania runs wild on you brother????
Today's play-
NYG/NYJ OVER 33 (1 unit)
Today's play-
NYG/NYJ OVER 33 (1 unit)
Sunday, August 15, 2010
TWO OUT OF THREE
Aint bad.
Tile Tequila should hire me as her body guard.
http://www.tmz.com/2010/08/14/tila-tequila-attack-juggalos-concert-photos/
Tile Tequila should hire me as her body guard.
http://www.tmz.com/2010/08/14/tila-tequila-attack-juggalos-concert-photos/
Saturday, August 14, 2010
TALIBAN!
Friday, August 13, 2010
RAIDERS
So as I venture into the gambling world again slowly but surely I have been perusing the odds for NFL futures. I think I can come up with one solid investment here. Oakland Raiders over 6.5 win total mark. Thank me later kind sirs.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
GOALS!
Well I have reached a cross roads in my life. I'm broken, I'm disheveled, and I'm angry. Despite all that I am still motivated.
Where do I go from here? I move forward. Inch by inch. I have always wanted to use this line. I can't quit, because if I do, the terrorists win. YES! You know what the best part is, around certain people, I bet if I said that, they would take that sentence as gospel.
On to the point of this post. My goals for the future.
Short term goals:
1)Get my legs back. Ohrah. I am Lieutenant Dan.
2)Get back into poker and dominate better then ever.
3)Get off all medicine.
Medium term goals:
1)Surpass the level of shape I was in 2 months ago.
2)Finish the Rosetta Stone course on Arabic.
Long term goals:
1)Get to NOLA and Disney World.
2)CIA or OCS
Where do I go from here? I move forward. Inch by inch. I have always wanted to use this line. I can't quit, because if I do, the terrorists win. YES! You know what the best part is, around certain people, I bet if I said that, they would take that sentence as gospel.
On to the point of this post. My goals for the future.
Short term goals:
1)Get my legs back. Ohrah. I am Lieutenant Dan.
2)Get back into poker and dominate better then ever.
3)Get off all medicine.
Medium term goals:
1)Surpass the level of shape I was in 2 months ago.
2)Finish the Rosetta Stone course on Arabic.
Long term goals:
1)Get to NOLA and Disney World.
2)CIA or OCS
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Thursday, April 8, 2010
According to reports by the military, two AH-64D "Apache" gun-ships were called to conduct a Close Air Support mission in support of ground forces engaged by hostiles with RPG's. This engagement was part of series of engagements that had been taking place throughout the day.
A RPG-7 (the most common variety in Iraq) is a man portable antitank or personnel weapon capable of engaging targets accurately up to 500m, with a range of about 900m. If using an anti-personnel warhead it can spread shrapnel over 25m, or if using a HEAT round it can disable a tank or destroy a HMMWV. They are a big deal because they are cheap and easy to fire, making them insurgent friendly for hasty ambushes. As far back as 2004 the ROE in Iraq was to engage anyone carrying one of these things because the only ones carrying them are insurgents. Iraqi Army units have them but we know those guys and they don't wear street clothes while on patrol. Those are the rules regarding RPG's and in 2007 every single Iraqi knows that.
The AH-64D, or "Apache", does not simply patrol the skies of Baghdad like some fucking beat cops. They are set up in on a specific patrol route and wait for someone to call for their support. Once they come in they secure the area by conducting Close Air Support. They are supporting the troops moving on the ground to the target/objective. If they recognize a threat displaying hostile intent they can engage after reporting and receiving permission OR if they feel the threat is imminent they can just attack. These guys actually gave the "RPG guy" some time before engaging by asking for permission. But the simply truth is that they identified what they thought was hostile intent (the RPG being present) and engaged. The hostile intent was the presence of the RPG. The "RPG guy" did not have to point it at them, just simply holding it in public constituted hostile intent towards the approaching ground forces.
According to Foxnews.com: "Julian Assange, a WikiLeaks editor, acknowledged to Fox News in an interview Tuesday evening that "it's likely some of the individuals seen in the video were carrying weapons." Assange said his suspicions about the weapons were so strong that a draft version of the video they produced made specific reference to the AK-47s and RPGs. Ultimately, Assange said, WikiLeaks became "unsure" about the weapons. He claimed the RPG could have been a camera tripod, so editors decided not to point it out. "Based upon visual evidence I suspect there probably were AKs and an RPG, but I'm not sure that means anything," Assange said. Nearly every Iraqi household has a rifle or an AK. Those guys could have just been protecting their area." The military has said Army units on the ground were experiencing RPG fire before calling in close air support. And although it could be argued AK-47 rifles are common household items, RPGs are not. Assange said video evidence of the cameras was much clearer than it was of the weapons and that military statements about the presence of weapons had already been widely distributed. But critics say those watching the video online or on television for the first time may not have had any knowledge of those statements. "It's ludicrous to allege that we have taken anything out of context in this video," Assange told Fox News.
(That's right, I used FOX as a source because they at least had the balls to post this to their front page and take on the account provided by Wikilinks- who can't even tell what their own edited video is showing…and yes, the video is edited because there are parts that have been magnified for "clarity". This is great for you armchair Generals, but this is not what the pilots saw on their viewers.)
An Apache is a two seat aircraft. The video shows the perspective of the weapons systems, but not the pilot or the gunner. The camera is taking about a 20 degree swipe of all possible visual information in the 360 degree area. You only see what the camera sees, but not everything that is taking place. The Apaches themselves are probably 500m away or even further. They could be closer. Whatever the circumstance, either the pilot or the gunner have eyes beyond what that camera alone sees. They also can't rewind the video to get a better look to see if the RPG pointing at them is actually a camera or not, they are already reacting to the object.
Hostile Intent
At 3:45, there is an Iraqi with an RPG. He is accompanied by others who have AK's. They are identified by the Apache's.
At 4:20, the idiot reporter who is meeting with the insurgents (and not identified as media in anyways) points something from around the corner of the same building that the guy with the RPG just walked towards. We know what it is now after multiple viewings and debate, but the Apache has already identified the RPG and anything looking like one now just sends them reacting, especially a guy behind a wall pointing a tube at them.
To be honest the guy with the camera looks like he is the catalyst for the attack. The Apaches engage after he "aims" at them and after they already PID the previous RPG at 3:45. To be fair I am certain that is a camera and not an RPG, but in a fight how would the Apaches know that? They can't rewind their sensors for another look.
The Apaches are already moving to engage when the camera is pointed at them, this is when they mistake the camera for an RPG and say "He is going to fire". Right as the reporter points his camera at them. Was he holding a camera? Sure was. Was he standing next to a guy with an RPG? Sure was. Did hide and point his camera from behind cover as the Apache passed? Sure did.
If you were the Apache what would you have done? Honestly? They did their jobs.
Hostile Intent was established once an RPG was identified. Incorrect or false detections have little bearing on the events that follow. The point is that the Apaches thought that they had identified a threat and acted. If one guy has an RPG and another points a camera that looks like an RPG it's already "too bad" for everyone involved. RPG trumps reporter's camera in threat to task list these pilots are already conducting. These guys rehearse these routines for hundred and perhaps thousands of flight hours, it becomes automatic.
Fleeing Enemies
First off, hostiles fleeing the combat area are still considered hostile. Just because they drop their weapons and try to flee does not make them "non-hostile", it just makes them hostiles attempting to escape. Secondly, fleeing is not surrendering. The rules are don't shoot those surrendering. Thirdly, who judges if an identified hostile is fleeing or maneuvering? Basic infantry tactics are built on the idea of maneuver warfare. If someone engages the infantry team they put down fire and begin to maneuver to a better position. Any group of insurgents carrying RPG's and AK's is for purposes an infantry team. You take them all down and keep them from running. Letting them escape can lead to bigger problems such as hostage taking or reentry into combat on their terms.
The Van: unmarked individuals aiding combatants during combat operations are fair game according to the military.
If the guys in the van are attempting to aid downed hostiles during a fight they can be considered impeding the conduct of an operation. They can be considered hostile by default because they can't be identified as anything else other than they are helping other hostiles during combat. These people were "Good Samaritans" according to most the reports that I have read, but when the Apache is conducting close air support they have to do their job. They have to protect the ground units that called in the support. Nobody can say if that van is a threat or not during the operation. It could have been another insurgent team, a bomb or packed full of kid but the guys with the best vantage during the operation made the call. Later, The part of the video with the kids being evaced annoys me because it has been edited by magnifying the image to try and show the kids. The screen on the Apache would not have been magnified to such an extent. The kids little white blob faces are practically invisible without the editing. This is also the part that pisses people off and I don't blame them. It is hard to watch after the fact because most of us assume we know what happened. By the way, those kids are taken to a US hospital which is lied about by Wikilinks for what that's worth.
The question is what the ROE was for unidentified Civilians on the Battlefield rendering aid to downed enemy combatants. Most ROE, and the Rules or War, prohibits attacking marked medical teams or vehicles. I'll honestly say that I don't know what the ROE was for these guys in this circumstance, but I'll give them the benefit of the doubt that they thought hostiles were attempting to recover downed hostiles and weapons. I give them that benefit because that is what they reported and that is good enough for me. I know from various reports that an investigation by the military already exonerated the actions of the pilots and that is better than the doctored (magnified) and false (i.e. "kids not taken to US hospital" comment) evidence that this video shows.
At 8:41, ground forces, aka "Bushmaster", are requesting to "walk on to the location", twenty seconds later the van shows up. The Apaches report the van to Bushmaster. This is after ground forces have committed to their movement into the combat area.
At 9:23, "Bushmaster" requests that the Apaches stop the van from picking up the bodies. The Apaches get clearance to fire from the ground element shortly after.
This sounds clean to me. Nobody engaged without reporting the situation and the intent was to maintain control of the situation as ground forces entered the area, which is exactly what should have happened.
Running over the body:
In military HMMWV's the driver sits low and the front hood's shape obscures the view directly in front of everyone other than the gunner. The gunner gives some direction to the driver if possible, but he was probably checking his vectors and not worrying about the ground right below him. My initial bet would be that they did not see the body. Running over the body on purpose would be questionable. I would still give benefit to the driver that he did not see the body. Dust, smoke, rubble will all add to the chaos. It's called the fog of war folks. The body looks like it fell on the reverse slop of some rubble, but it could have simply fallen on the best Infil Route to the scene and was unavoidable.
Cover Up:
This type of video is naturally classified and anyone with a clearance knows why. It has nothing to do with the actual event, which looks cut and dry to anyone who has ever been in the situation or at least understands why the Apaches engaged. It has to do with the tactics, techniques and procedures being displayed by a variety of US forces during a combat operation. It also may show sensitive capabilities and limitations on our current and primary Close Air Support system used in theater.
I'll admit that it's certainly not the militaries finest hour, but it is hardly the work of murders and executioners hell bent on simply killing Iraqis. They could do that whenever they wanted, they have the fire power readily available. This at most was a case of mistaken identity brought on by reporters being in the wrong place at the wrong time (which Reuters all but admits by stating "they were not wearing press badges around insurgents"). At the very least this was a clean kill on a team of insurgents carrying a RPG and toting AK's and the reporters picked the wrong day to hang out with their friends.
Murderers and Executioners? A three year old event, based on an illegally obtained video, edited by a bias organization and posted on Huffington's website…
Why not just take the thirty pieces of silver?
Reuters admits that their people were in the wrong place and not wearing the right markings. They even have this guy, Anthony Dworkin, the director of the Crimes of War Project, which studies humanitarian law in conflict, saying "it did not appear that the pilots had intentionally targeted civilians" on their own new story about the incident (Adam Entous, Reuters, Wednesday, April 7, 2010; 8:21 PM).
Wikilinks admits that ""it's likely some of the individuals seen in the video were carrying weapons".
The Military is right now prosecuting a Navy SEAL for punching a terrorist in the nose yet they "covered up" this? Why not just cover up the SEAL punching the guy in the nose too? Does that make sense to anyone? The Military got their asses handed to them by the Abu Guraub scandal, they don't cover anything up. We have had dozens of our warfighters prosecuted, hundreds admonished and careers ruined, and thousands investigated for doing their jobs. The majority of these guys are not rapist or murders. Some made poor decisions; others made the best they could in the situation, and most did nothing wrong at all and are exonerated after months of scrutiny by their people that they have to trust the most.
It's war. A war that has gone on for the better part of a decade and we are actually winning. People would rather see us defeated and come home losers to an "illegal war" than see us achieve victory and give this country back to those people…that's what I want, because we already paid the price. Every single warfigher over there is trying like hell to do the best they can do with a shitty situation.
How hard is it to simply ask them to do better? 99 percent are busting their asses to make sure nothing bad happens to civilians. They can do better, no organization is perfect, but you simply call them all murders and executioners based on event people can't even understand.
A RPG-7 (the most common variety in Iraq) is a man portable antitank or personnel weapon capable of engaging targets accurately up to 500m, with a range of about 900m. If using an anti-personnel warhead it can spread shrapnel over 25m, or if using a HEAT round it can disable a tank or destroy a HMMWV. They are a big deal because they are cheap and easy to fire, making them insurgent friendly for hasty ambushes. As far back as 2004 the ROE in Iraq was to engage anyone carrying one of these things because the only ones carrying them are insurgents. Iraqi Army units have them but we know those guys and they don't wear street clothes while on patrol. Those are the rules regarding RPG's and in 2007 every single Iraqi knows that.
The AH-64D, or "Apache", does not simply patrol the skies of Baghdad like some fucking beat cops. They are set up in on a specific patrol route and wait for someone to call for their support. Once they come in they secure the area by conducting Close Air Support. They are supporting the troops moving on the ground to the target/objective. If they recognize a threat displaying hostile intent they can engage after reporting and receiving permission OR if they feel the threat is imminent they can just attack. These guys actually gave the "RPG guy" some time before engaging by asking for permission. But the simply truth is that they identified what they thought was hostile intent (the RPG being present) and engaged. The hostile intent was the presence of the RPG. The "RPG guy" did not have to point it at them, just simply holding it in public constituted hostile intent towards the approaching ground forces.
According to Foxnews.com: "Julian Assange, a WikiLeaks editor, acknowledged to Fox News in an interview Tuesday evening that "it's likely some of the individuals seen in the video were carrying weapons." Assange said his suspicions about the weapons were so strong that a draft version of the video they produced made specific reference to the AK-47s and RPGs. Ultimately, Assange said, WikiLeaks became "unsure" about the weapons. He claimed the RPG could have been a camera tripod, so editors decided not to point it out. "Based upon visual evidence I suspect there probably were AKs and an RPG, but I'm not sure that means anything," Assange said. Nearly every Iraqi household has a rifle or an AK. Those guys could have just been protecting their area." The military has said Army units on the ground were experiencing RPG fire before calling in close air support. And although it could be argued AK-47 rifles are common household items, RPGs are not. Assange said video evidence of the cameras was much clearer than it was of the weapons and that military statements about the presence of weapons had already been widely distributed. But critics say those watching the video online or on television for the first time may not have had any knowledge of those statements. "It's ludicrous to allege that we have taken anything out of context in this video," Assange told Fox News.
(That's right, I used FOX as a source because they at least had the balls to post this to their front page and take on the account provided by Wikilinks- who can't even tell what their own edited video is showing…and yes, the video is edited because there are parts that have been magnified for "clarity". This is great for you armchair Generals, but this is not what the pilots saw on their viewers.)
An Apache is a two seat aircraft. The video shows the perspective of the weapons systems, but not the pilot or the gunner. The camera is taking about a 20 degree swipe of all possible visual information in the 360 degree area. You only see what the camera sees, but not everything that is taking place. The Apaches themselves are probably 500m away or even further. They could be closer. Whatever the circumstance, either the pilot or the gunner have eyes beyond what that camera alone sees. They also can't rewind the video to get a better look to see if the RPG pointing at them is actually a camera or not, they are already reacting to the object.
Hostile Intent
At 3:45, there is an Iraqi with an RPG. He is accompanied by others who have AK's. They are identified by the Apache's.
At 4:20, the idiot reporter who is meeting with the insurgents (and not identified as media in anyways) points something from around the corner of the same building that the guy with the RPG just walked towards. We know what it is now after multiple viewings and debate, but the Apache has already identified the RPG and anything looking like one now just sends them reacting, especially a guy behind a wall pointing a tube at them.
To be honest the guy with the camera looks like he is the catalyst for the attack. The Apaches engage after he "aims" at them and after they already PID the previous RPG at 3:45. To be fair I am certain that is a camera and not an RPG, but in a fight how would the Apaches know that? They can't rewind their sensors for another look.
The Apaches are already moving to engage when the camera is pointed at them, this is when they mistake the camera for an RPG and say "He is going to fire". Right as the reporter points his camera at them. Was he holding a camera? Sure was. Was he standing next to a guy with an RPG? Sure was. Did hide and point his camera from behind cover as the Apache passed? Sure did.
If you were the Apache what would you have done? Honestly? They did their jobs.
Hostile Intent was established once an RPG was identified. Incorrect or false detections have little bearing on the events that follow. The point is that the Apaches thought that they had identified a threat and acted. If one guy has an RPG and another points a camera that looks like an RPG it's already "too bad" for everyone involved. RPG trumps reporter's camera in threat to task list these pilots are already conducting. These guys rehearse these routines for hundred and perhaps thousands of flight hours, it becomes automatic.
Fleeing Enemies
First off, hostiles fleeing the combat area are still considered hostile. Just because they drop their weapons and try to flee does not make them "non-hostile", it just makes them hostiles attempting to escape. Secondly, fleeing is not surrendering. The rules are don't shoot those surrendering. Thirdly, who judges if an identified hostile is fleeing or maneuvering? Basic infantry tactics are built on the idea of maneuver warfare. If someone engages the infantry team they put down fire and begin to maneuver to a better position. Any group of insurgents carrying RPG's and AK's is for purposes an infantry team. You take them all down and keep them from running. Letting them escape can lead to bigger problems such as hostage taking or reentry into combat on their terms.
The Van: unmarked individuals aiding combatants during combat operations are fair game according to the military.
If the guys in the van are attempting to aid downed hostiles during a fight they can be considered impeding the conduct of an operation. They can be considered hostile by default because they can't be identified as anything else other than they are helping other hostiles during combat. These people were "Good Samaritans" according to most the reports that I have read, but when the Apache is conducting close air support they have to do their job. They have to protect the ground units that called in the support. Nobody can say if that van is a threat or not during the operation. It could have been another insurgent team, a bomb or packed full of kid but the guys with the best vantage during the operation made the call. Later, The part of the video with the kids being evaced annoys me because it has been edited by magnifying the image to try and show the kids. The screen on the Apache would not have been magnified to such an extent. The kids little white blob faces are practically invisible without the editing. This is also the part that pisses people off and I don't blame them. It is hard to watch after the fact because most of us assume we know what happened. By the way, those kids are taken to a US hospital which is lied about by Wikilinks for what that's worth.
The question is what the ROE was for unidentified Civilians on the Battlefield rendering aid to downed enemy combatants. Most ROE, and the Rules or War, prohibits attacking marked medical teams or vehicles. I'll honestly say that I don't know what the ROE was for these guys in this circumstance, but I'll give them the benefit of the doubt that they thought hostiles were attempting to recover downed hostiles and weapons. I give them that benefit because that is what they reported and that is good enough for me. I know from various reports that an investigation by the military already exonerated the actions of the pilots and that is better than the doctored (magnified) and false (i.e. "kids not taken to US hospital" comment) evidence that this video shows.
At 8:41, ground forces, aka "Bushmaster", are requesting to "walk on to the location", twenty seconds later the van shows up. The Apaches report the van to Bushmaster. This is after ground forces have committed to their movement into the combat area.
At 9:23, "Bushmaster" requests that the Apaches stop the van from picking up the bodies. The Apaches get clearance to fire from the ground element shortly after.
This sounds clean to me. Nobody engaged without reporting the situation and the intent was to maintain control of the situation as ground forces entered the area, which is exactly what should have happened.
Running over the body:
In military HMMWV's the driver sits low and the front hood's shape obscures the view directly in front of everyone other than the gunner. The gunner gives some direction to the driver if possible, but he was probably checking his vectors and not worrying about the ground right below him. My initial bet would be that they did not see the body. Running over the body on purpose would be questionable. I would still give benefit to the driver that he did not see the body. Dust, smoke, rubble will all add to the chaos. It's called the fog of war folks. The body looks like it fell on the reverse slop of some rubble, but it could have simply fallen on the best Infil Route to the scene and was unavoidable.
Cover Up:
This type of video is naturally classified and anyone with a clearance knows why. It has nothing to do with the actual event, which looks cut and dry to anyone who has ever been in the situation or at least understands why the Apaches engaged. It has to do with the tactics, techniques and procedures being displayed by a variety of US forces during a combat operation. It also may show sensitive capabilities and limitations on our current and primary Close Air Support system used in theater.
I'll admit that it's certainly not the militaries finest hour, but it is hardly the work of murders and executioners hell bent on simply killing Iraqis. They could do that whenever they wanted, they have the fire power readily available. This at most was a case of mistaken identity brought on by reporters being in the wrong place at the wrong time (which Reuters all but admits by stating "they were not wearing press badges around insurgents"). At the very least this was a clean kill on a team of insurgents carrying a RPG and toting AK's and the reporters picked the wrong day to hang out with their friends.
Murderers and Executioners? A three year old event, based on an illegally obtained video, edited by a bias organization and posted on Huffington's website…
Why not just take the thirty pieces of silver?
Reuters admits that their people were in the wrong place and not wearing the right markings. They even have this guy, Anthony Dworkin, the director of the Crimes of War Project, which studies humanitarian law in conflict, saying "it did not appear that the pilots had intentionally targeted civilians" on their own new story about the incident (Adam Entous, Reuters, Wednesday, April 7, 2010; 8:21 PM).
Wikilinks admits that ""it's likely some of the individuals seen in the video were carrying weapons".
The Military is right now prosecuting a Navy SEAL for punching a terrorist in the nose yet they "covered up" this? Why not just cover up the SEAL punching the guy in the nose too? Does that make sense to anyone? The Military got their asses handed to them by the Abu Guraub scandal, they don't cover anything up. We have had dozens of our warfighters prosecuted, hundreds admonished and careers ruined, and thousands investigated for doing their jobs. The majority of these guys are not rapist or murders. Some made poor decisions; others made the best they could in the situation, and most did nothing wrong at all and are exonerated after months of scrutiny by their people that they have to trust the most.
It's war. A war that has gone on for the better part of a decade and we are actually winning. People would rather see us defeated and come home losers to an "illegal war" than see us achieve victory and give this country back to those people…that's what I want, because we already paid the price. Every single warfigher over there is trying like hell to do the best they can do with a shitty situation.
How hard is it to simply ask them to do better? 99 percent are busting their asses to make sure nothing bad happens to civilians. They can do better, no organization is perfect, but you simply call them all murders and executioners based on event people can't even understand.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Caron Butler
Bye Caron Butler. You are my favorite basketball player. I'm sad to see you leaving my town. The wizards suck, but they will super suck now imo.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Poker Update
So yesterday I played again I guess for the first time since I last updated. Made about a hundred. Lost in tourneys. Won in cash games. I'm working on finding a better way to update with graphs and such. Should be good.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Are You Watching The Jersey Shore???
You should be!
I didn't want to. I couldn't. I shouldn't. I finally broke down and took in an episode. I was hooked in five minutes. It is without a doubt the greatest thing on TV right now. I know you don't want to watch it, but you have to. You really just have to. It's that awesome. Since I know my three readers haven't watched the show, I will give you a player breakdown.
The guys:
Vinnie: The family guy with no inhibitions that is completely laid back. Would not be shocked to see him out at the bar on a Thursday.
Quote:
I don't give a fuck. You're fat, you're ugly, you're 45 years-old, I'll dance with you. It's hilarious, ya know what I mean?
Pauly D: That overly gregarious guy you know with little man's disease that will snap at the first sign of conflict so he can be sure he throws the first punch before the fight breaks up
Quote:
We’re beatin’-up-the-beat, that’s what we say when we’re doing our fist pump. First, we start off by banging the ground, we’re banging it as the beat builds ‘cause that beat’s hittin’ us so we’re fightin’ back, it’s like we beat up that beat.
Ronnie: The dude you knew in high school that just loves to stare at himself in the weight room mirror and strut around wanting girls to stare at him. COMPLETE meathead.
Quote:
Schnickers is like crying 'cause she got punched in the face and like The Situation is creepin'.
Mike (The Situation): Your completely overconfident friend that is secretly very insecure about who he actually is. Uses one thing he has to distract focus from all his faults. When things don't go his way he becomes completely lost in the world and you honestly worry that he may end his life... btw this guy is the star of the show imo.
The girls:
Jwow: That woman who has lost her fastball. She's like Jamie Moyer out there relying on old standbys and dammit she's gonna get her innings in. She's 9 years past her prime and flaunts her boobs in hopes that others don't realize her dump truck of a face. Fwiw though... she DOES have a slammin body.
Angelina: That ultra feminist chick that loves the power that comes from cockblocking other dudes. However, lest she be labeled someone that has no fun, she will pretend to hook up with repulsive dudes on a whim and then lie her ass off about it later. She thinks she's enigmatic when really she's just a horrid bitch.
Sammi: Sammi of the 8 is most likely to hold down a real job in the future. She's kind of a bitch in that she loves squaring men off against each other just to show her power. Personally, this kind of girl absolutely turns me on. I love exerting dominance over them. If you're weak around her she will absolutely run you over and laugh about it.
Nicole: Nickname is Snookie but most of the others derisively call her Snickers, which, HILARIOUS. She's that girl you know that has no redeeming qualities so she goes out and gets horribly sloppy and then tries to make up for it by being mom-like the next day. She is, and this is really saying something, the biggest attention whore on the show having already staged a fake walkout in the first episode! I'm so excited to watch her just combust throughout the whole season. She will be liked by nobody in 2 weeks. Book it.
Well there it is. If you aren't watching now you have an intro that's worthy of people you probably already know. Get to it guys.
I didn't want to. I couldn't. I shouldn't. I finally broke down and took in an episode. I was hooked in five minutes. It is without a doubt the greatest thing on TV right now. I know you don't want to watch it, but you have to. You really just have to. It's that awesome. Since I know my three readers haven't watched the show, I will give you a player breakdown.
The guys:
Vinnie: The family guy with no inhibitions that is completely laid back. Would not be shocked to see him out at the bar on a Thursday.
Quote:
I don't give a fuck. You're fat, you're ugly, you're 45 years-old, I'll dance with you. It's hilarious, ya know what I mean?
Pauly D: That overly gregarious guy you know with little man's disease that will snap at the first sign of conflict so he can be sure he throws the first punch before the fight breaks up
Quote:
We’re beatin’-up-the-beat, that’s what we say when we’re doing our fist pump. First, we start off by banging the ground, we’re banging it as the beat builds ‘cause that beat’s hittin’ us so we’re fightin’ back, it’s like we beat up that beat.
Ronnie: The dude you knew in high school that just loves to stare at himself in the weight room mirror and strut around wanting girls to stare at him. COMPLETE meathead.
Quote:
Schnickers is like crying 'cause she got punched in the face and like The Situation is creepin'.
Mike (The Situation): Your completely overconfident friend that is secretly very insecure about who he actually is. Uses one thing he has to distract focus from all his faults. When things don't go his way he becomes completely lost in the world and you honestly worry that he may end his life... btw this guy is the star of the show imo.
The girls:
Jwow: That woman who has lost her fastball. She's like Jamie Moyer out there relying on old standbys and dammit she's gonna get her innings in. She's 9 years past her prime and flaunts her boobs in hopes that others don't realize her dump truck of a face. Fwiw though... she DOES have a slammin body.
Angelina: That ultra feminist chick that loves the power that comes from cockblocking other dudes. However, lest she be labeled someone that has no fun, she will pretend to hook up with repulsive dudes on a whim and then lie her ass off about it later. She thinks she's enigmatic when really she's just a horrid bitch.
Sammi: Sammi of the 8 is most likely to hold down a real job in the future. She's kind of a bitch in that she loves squaring men off against each other just to show her power. Personally, this kind of girl absolutely turns me on. I love exerting dominance over them. If you're weak around her she will absolutely run you over and laugh about it.
Nicole: Nickname is Snookie but most of the others derisively call her Snickers, which, HILARIOUS. She's that girl you know that has no redeeming qualities so she goes out and gets horribly sloppy and then tries to make up for it by being mom-like the next day. She is, and this is really saying something, the biggest attention whore on the show having already staged a fake walkout in the first episode! I'm so excited to watch her just combust throughout the whole season. She will be liked by nobody in 2 weeks. Book it.
Well there it is. If you aren't watching now you have an intro that's worthy of people you probably already know. Get to it guys.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Part 4
part 4
Twilight 2 is coming out soon, that means one thing- vampires are sick. Let alone a fucking diesel alpha vampire with authentic Robert Pattinson fangs, got em in last week. can’t nobody touch this! Not only did I just 1-up Chris’s new frost, I just locked down some well deserved epic tang for tonight, prob twins. Making my way over to roomie’s room I remember him telling me Jill was coming over tonight and not to say anything this time. Jill is his downfall, she’s plain faced, stuck up, and I despise her like Mjackson despises sleeping with adult women. Looking at the bottom of his door I see the lights are off but his TV is on. Without hesitation I bust open the door and see Marley & Me playing on his weak 32’ Vizio. Looking over at the futon him and Jill are sitting about a foot apart holding hands. Flicking on the lights I’m unable to hold back laughing as I walk over and scoop up the remote. Turning the TV to Malcom in the Middle I look over and say, “yo bro, you wanna roll me up a blunt, don’t you??”
Glancing quickly at Jill he looks back to me and says, “oh you know we were kinda watching a movie, can I do it after?”
Fucking fag.
Jill takes her hand away and looks up at roomie and says in an accusatory voice, “I thought you said you stopped smoking?”
Sitting down at roomies desk and pullin out the bubble kush I snap back, “fuck you Jill go die in a grease fire.”
Looking shocked she cries out, “EXCUSE ME. What did you just say?”
Springing up from the char I walk back over and turn off the TV. Looking down at her I say, “dates over. FUCK OFF!” while raising my finger to the door.
“FUCK YOU!” she screams back.
Women.
Feeling the blood rush through my body as I begin to boil over with rage and testosterone I take the controller and hurl it through the wall behind them. Holding my hand in the air I yell out “FIVE!” as I drop a finger. My roommate looks up at me in panic, shaking his head “no” I yell out “FOUR!” as I drop another finger. At once he turns toward Jill and cries, “you have to get out of here!”. “THREE!” I scream out as I begin to advance forward.
With terror in her eyes Jill jumps off the futon and runs out of the bedroom door as roomie cries out, “sooorrry!” She rushes down the stairs and slams the front door shut as she runs out to her car. “Ahhh that’s better” I say as I let out a huge sigh of relief. Pointing over to the grinder on the desk I say, “alright, now roll that up! and get ready, we’re going out.”
Walking back to my room to grab Chris I hear the fan still running in the bathroom; figuring Chris accidentally left it on I go in to turn it off. As soon as I open up the door I see Chris kneeling down, taking a line of cocaine off the sink. Frozen, I stand where I am as Chris quickly turns around and gets to his feet. Looking completely wired he walks over to me and grabs me by the shoulder and says, “alright! lets do this!” Before I’m able to respond he’s already down the stairs and out the door.
Twilight 2 is coming out soon, that means one thing- vampires are sick. Let alone a fucking diesel alpha vampire with authentic Robert Pattinson fangs, got em in last week. can’t nobody touch this! Not only did I just 1-up Chris’s new frost, I just locked down some well deserved epic tang for tonight, prob twins. Making my way over to roomie’s room I remember him telling me Jill was coming over tonight and not to say anything this time. Jill is his downfall, she’s plain faced, stuck up, and I despise her like Mjackson despises sleeping with adult women. Looking at the bottom of his door I see the lights are off but his TV is on. Without hesitation I bust open the door and see Marley & Me playing on his weak 32’ Vizio. Looking over at the futon him and Jill are sitting about a foot apart holding hands. Flicking on the lights I’m unable to hold back laughing as I walk over and scoop up the remote. Turning the TV to Malcom in the Middle I look over and say, “yo bro, you wanna roll me up a blunt, don’t you??”
Glancing quickly at Jill he looks back to me and says, “oh you know we were kinda watching a movie, can I do it after?”
Fucking fag.
Jill takes her hand away and looks up at roomie and says in an accusatory voice, “I thought you said you stopped smoking?”
Sitting down at roomies desk and pullin out the bubble kush I snap back, “fuck you Jill go die in a grease fire.”
Looking shocked she cries out, “EXCUSE ME. What did you just say?”
Springing up from the char I walk back over and turn off the TV. Looking down at her I say, “dates over. FUCK OFF!” while raising my finger to the door.
“FUCK YOU!” she screams back.
Women.
Feeling the blood rush through my body as I begin to boil over with rage and testosterone I take the controller and hurl it through the wall behind them. Holding my hand in the air I yell out “FIVE!” as I drop a finger. My roommate looks up at me in panic, shaking his head “no” I yell out “FOUR!” as I drop another finger. At once he turns toward Jill and cries, “you have to get out of here!”. “THREE!” I scream out as I begin to advance forward.
With terror in her eyes Jill jumps off the futon and runs out of the bedroom door as roomie cries out, “sooorrry!” She rushes down the stairs and slams the front door shut as she runs out to her car. “Ahhh that’s better” I say as I let out a huge sigh of relief. Pointing over to the grinder on the desk I say, “alright, now roll that up! and get ready, we’re going out.”
Walking back to my room to grab Chris I hear the fan still running in the bathroom; figuring Chris accidentally left it on I go in to turn it off. As soon as I open up the door I see Chris kneeling down, taking a line of cocaine off the sink. Frozen, I stand where I am as Chris quickly turns around and gets to his feet. Looking completely wired he walks over to me and grabs me by the shoulder and says, “alright! lets do this!” Before I’m able to respond he’s already down the stairs and out the door.
John Edwards
You know after thinking about my main man Johnny boy for a little while I've come to a conclusion Its not that he cheated on his cancer stricken wife and had a baby with another woman. His mistress. Or that he publicly denied it. Or that he was willing to become president knowing it might all be exposed and that he might be impeached for it.
Those are all bad, really bad, but I thought about something else. If you watched Edwards denials you will notice that he talked with a sincerity that is exactly of the same style as his public political pronouncements. How frightening is that?
Normal people give off pretty big hints that they just might be lying from their style of speech. Conversely when they are definitely telling the truth we can usually sense it in their delivery. But Edwards has shown that he, and very likely most politicians, have a talent for lying that rivals most movie stars. Thus we now know that not only WILL poloticians lie if they need to, but also that we can’t trust our usual instincts when they speak about anything. But then again, most people don't trust the government anyways.
Those are all bad, really bad, but I thought about something else. If you watched Edwards denials you will notice that he talked with a sincerity that is exactly of the same style as his public political pronouncements. How frightening is that?
Normal people give off pretty big hints that they just might be lying from their style of speech. Conversely when they are definitely telling the truth we can usually sense it in their delivery. But Edwards has shown that he, and very likely most politicians, have a talent for lying that rivals most movie stars. Thus we now know that not only WILL poloticians lie if they need to, but also that we can’t trust our usual instincts when they speak about anything. But then again, most people don't trust the government anyways.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Part Three
"That feel good Chris?" I say as I continue to massage his dome. Squeezing on the last of the highlight paste I go back to work, guaranteeing milky white success .I'm like Chefboyardee making ravioli, I make magic. (tip: directions says 15min is all u need, but that means 1hr = 4x more baller.) So sick, a new frost storms into the club scene tonight, this is how we live.
Seeing the impatient look on Chris face he replies "damn how long has it been holmes?"
Flicking out my arm and flashing the new platinum Movado timepiece in the mirror I nonchalantly say, "juuuust about an hour."
"An hour??? Fuck, get me outta here!" Chris cries out as he stands up from the chair and makes his way to the bathroom. Furious that Chris wasn’t appreciating my hard work and dedication I look at him and yell, "well fuck you Chris! How you gonna do your best guido like that??? I just spent the last 2hrs on you motherfucking tips son!" Seeing Chris face go from surprised to enraged I’m instantly regretting what I said. Almost out the door at this point, Chris whips around and strides across the room in two swift confident steps. Taking out his gun i hear the *click-clack* as he puts a round in the chamber and presses the nozzle of the gun against my temple. I see a disturbed and enraged look on his face as he whispers into my ear in a dangerous angered voice, “WHAT DID YOU SAY?”
Trembling at the knees I look up into Chris eerily dark eyes and say,”so this is how it ends……BROTHER!” (As i raise the palm of my hand between us, showing him the scar that bonded us for eterninty.)The pressure of the Smith & Wesson eases up off my temple as Chris lowers his gun. Whispering back into my ear with the hiss of a snake he says, “don’t fucking piss me off bro…” Trying to save some face and dignity I say nothing back, instead I take in a deep breath in and pump up the Tommy Gunns- a tiger showing off his claws, I am not afraid to intimidate. In a standstill for the next few seconds Chris finally turns around and makes his way to the bathroom. Walking to the door he looks over his shoulder and says, “I’m showering, get ready.”
Heart still pumping as I step into my walk in closet. I’m lovin how Chris doesnt take shit from anyone. Pullin a glock 9 on ur own blood? That's fucking bossy bro. Going to the club with him on my side means I can fucking start beef with anyone I god damn want to. I just became untouchable. Flicking on the light switch I walk straight to my A-game section. Need something bomb, Chris gonna be turning heads with his old prom suit + new tips. Can’t have a team from Philly outshining the New YorkYankees u dig? Gotta pull out all out all the stops now.
Looking baller as fuck I come out wearing the long sleeve button down with the popped collar + beanie, reppin “the dedicated business outdoors man”- guaranteed snatch. Walking past the bathroom door i hear the clink of Chris's gun hit the sink. Pausing for a minute I wait and hear the shower door close and the water turn on.
Creeping up to the door and gingerly turning the knob I sneak into the bathroom and dart towards the sink. Quietly grabbing his gun and trying to work as fast as possible I pop the clip and empty all of the rounds in my front pocket. Hands getting damp as the bathroom continues to flood with steam I carefully place his gun back down and slowly close the door. Staying hardcore ninja quiet the whole time I'm pretty sure he wont notice a thing, but my heart still racing I can’t help but pace. Needing something to calm the nerves I decide to walk over to my roomies room and have him roll me up one while Chris finishes getting ready.
Seeing the impatient look on Chris face he replies "damn how long has it been holmes?"
Flicking out my arm and flashing the new platinum Movado timepiece in the mirror I nonchalantly say, "juuuust about an hour."
"An hour??? Fuck, get me outta here!" Chris cries out as he stands up from the chair and makes his way to the bathroom. Furious that Chris wasn’t appreciating my hard work and dedication I look at him and yell, "well fuck you Chris! How you gonna do your best guido like that??? I just spent the last 2hrs on you motherfucking tips son!" Seeing Chris face go from surprised to enraged I’m instantly regretting what I said. Almost out the door at this point, Chris whips around and strides across the room in two swift confident steps. Taking out his gun i hear the *click-clack* as he puts a round in the chamber and presses the nozzle of the gun against my temple. I see a disturbed and enraged look on his face as he whispers into my ear in a dangerous angered voice, “WHAT DID YOU SAY?”
Trembling at the knees I look up into Chris eerily dark eyes and say,”so this is how it ends……BROTHER!” (As i raise the palm of my hand between us, showing him the scar that bonded us for eterninty.)The pressure of the Smith & Wesson eases up off my temple as Chris lowers his gun. Whispering back into my ear with the hiss of a snake he says, “don’t fucking piss me off bro…” Trying to save some face and dignity I say nothing back, instead I take in a deep breath in and pump up the Tommy Gunns- a tiger showing off his claws, I am not afraid to intimidate. In a standstill for the next few seconds Chris finally turns around and makes his way to the bathroom. Walking to the door he looks over his shoulder and says, “I’m showering, get ready.”
Heart still pumping as I step into my walk in closet. I’m lovin how Chris doesnt take shit from anyone. Pullin a glock 9 on ur own blood? That's fucking bossy bro. Going to the club with him on my side means I can fucking start beef with anyone I god damn want to. I just became untouchable. Flicking on the light switch I walk straight to my A-game section. Need something bomb, Chris gonna be turning heads with his old prom suit + new tips. Can’t have a team from Philly outshining the New YorkYankees u dig? Gotta pull out all out all the stops now.
Looking baller as fuck I come out wearing the long sleeve button down with the popped collar + beanie, reppin “the dedicated business outdoors man”- guaranteed snatch. Walking past the bathroom door i hear the clink of Chris's gun hit the sink. Pausing for a minute I wait and hear the shower door close and the water turn on.
Creeping up to the door and gingerly turning the knob I sneak into the bathroom and dart towards the sink. Quietly grabbing his gun and trying to work as fast as possible I pop the clip and empty all of the rounds in my front pocket. Hands getting damp as the bathroom continues to flood with steam I carefully place his gun back down and slowly close the door. Staying hardcore ninja quiet the whole time I'm pretty sure he wont notice a thing, but my heart still racing I can’t help but pace. Needing something to calm the nerves I decide to walk over to my roomies room and have him roll me up one while Chris finishes getting ready.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Part 2
Just getttin out of the shower I walk into my bedroom feeling immaculate, gotta brighten up before the night out, you know the drill. I see Chris already tripping out to some sick techno song on the Bose, and only with a towel around my waist I can't help but get in on the action. Moshing with Chris I see his stare come down from my eyes and onto my Tommy Gunn's. I put up 225lb on the bench last week, no biggie. "Damn boy! What the fuck you been eating?" he says with a stunned look on his face. "doesn't matter what you eat if you work it off” I reply.
He doesnt say anything back and just looks on in enmity, I know I can't leave him hanging so I yell, "yo Chris you looking aiight.." and I immediately see his face light up and ask, "you think so?" "oh yeah." I respond and start to think of what he'd really like to do...THEN IT HIT ME! "Chris I got an idea."
"Whats that?" he asks.
Looking at his dark black hair i say, "FRRRROOOOSSSSTTTTT.......THHHHEEEEE.....TIPPPPS.....BRAH." He immediately knows what I'm talking about and screams, "yup!" like a little girly getting her first pony and before I know it we get in my esco and roll up to Tina's Salon. On the way there some typical Z-28 Camaro douchebag driver cuts me off and I’m forced to make a sharp turn almost driving myself off the road in order to dodge him. Looking over at my cousin I see he’s enraged as he quickly unfastens his seat belt and reaches towards his waist. Looking over at him I say “CHRIS…what the fuck are you going to do”. instantly jumping out of his seat and pointing towards the Z-28 he bellows out, “FUCK THAT MOTHERFUCKER SON! HE COULDA KILLED US YO!” Not getting an answer to my question I ask him again, “what are you gonna do?” Looking at me directly in the eyes he says, “nothing.” and we sit in silence the rest of the way there.
Pulling up to Tina’s Salon I take out my snake-skin wallet and flip through a few c-notes trying to find a slimy one, when he says, "no brah, its chill, I got this." He flashes me his Smith & Wesson lodged in his belt. Before I respond the idiot opens the car door and dashes into the salon.
Knowing whats about to happen I call up Tina herself and let her know the gun is fake and that he's my cousin, and that I'd pay for anything he takes, and just to please not call the cops. See when you tan and get frost tips as much as this playa does, you get on a first name basis with da salon owner yo. Just as I watch her put the phone down I see the gun rise from the waist of Chris and it's pointed directly at Tina’s face. I can tell he’s yelling something at her as he calmly sweeps through the store and grabs an $189 highlight kit. We don't roll cheap yo. With the gun still aimed he promptly backs his way out until he gets to the door, he turns around and sprints back to the SUV.
With an excited look on his face he gets back into the passenger seat and starts reading through the directions and checking out the box until I finally say “so what happened?” He looks up as if he was stunned to be in the parking lot still when he says “well I got it!” Holding it up to my face with a grin, then he says, “but we need to get the fuck out of here now.” Agreeing with him I put the beast in speed mode and I race home thinking how sick it’d be if I was the one getting the new frosted tips. Damn it would be nice. Almost wanted to double back to the salon to get a lil something for myself, but we got no time- its already 7 and we only got a couple hours to get ready.
He doesnt say anything back and just looks on in enmity, I know I can't leave him hanging so I yell, "yo Chris you looking aiight.." and I immediately see his face light up and ask, "you think so?" "oh yeah." I respond and start to think of what he'd really like to do...THEN IT HIT ME! "Chris I got an idea."
"Whats that?" he asks.
Looking at his dark black hair i say, "FRRRROOOOSSSSTTTTT.......THHHHEEEEE.....TIPPPPS.....BRAH." He immediately knows what I'm talking about and screams, "yup!" like a little girly getting her first pony and before I know it we get in my esco and roll up to Tina's Salon. On the way there some typical Z-28 Camaro douchebag driver cuts me off and I’m forced to make a sharp turn almost driving myself off the road in order to dodge him. Looking over at my cousin I see he’s enraged as he quickly unfastens his seat belt and reaches towards his waist. Looking over at him I say “CHRIS…what the fuck are you going to do”. instantly jumping out of his seat and pointing towards the Z-28 he bellows out, “FUCK THAT MOTHERFUCKER SON! HE COULDA KILLED US YO!” Not getting an answer to my question I ask him again, “what are you gonna do?” Looking at me directly in the eyes he says, “nothing.” and we sit in silence the rest of the way there.
Pulling up to Tina’s Salon I take out my snake-skin wallet and flip through a few c-notes trying to find a slimy one, when he says, "no brah, its chill, I got this." He flashes me his Smith & Wesson lodged in his belt. Before I respond the idiot opens the car door and dashes into the salon.
Knowing whats about to happen I call up Tina herself and let her know the gun is fake and that he's my cousin, and that I'd pay for anything he takes, and just to please not call the cops. See when you tan and get frost tips as much as this playa does, you get on a first name basis with da salon owner yo. Just as I watch her put the phone down I see the gun rise from the waist of Chris and it's pointed directly at Tina’s face. I can tell he’s yelling something at her as he calmly sweeps through the store and grabs an $189 highlight kit. We don't roll cheap yo. With the gun still aimed he promptly backs his way out until he gets to the door, he turns around and sprints back to the SUV.
With an excited look on his face he gets back into the passenger seat and starts reading through the directions and checking out the box until I finally say “so what happened?” He looks up as if he was stunned to be in the parking lot still when he says “well I got it!” Holding it up to my face with a grin, then he says, “but we need to get the fuck out of here now.” Agreeing with him I put the beast in speed mode and I race home thinking how sick it’d be if I was the one getting the new frosted tips. Damn it would be nice. Almost wanted to double back to the salon to get a lil something for myself, but we got no time- its already 7 and we only got a couple hours to get ready.
Poker Blog
So from this point on I'm keeping 100% track of all poker results on here. Since I've done one retarded thing as of late to garner a bit of respect I didn't deserve this will help show the player I really am.
Right now I'm only playing on FTP. My screenname is luckbox124 on tilt. All results can be found here. Just put in luckbox124 for Full Tilt Poker. You may need to open an account. But it won't take more then 2 minutes and it's free.
So day 1:
+$486.21
4.2 hours
$114.85 per hour
Right now I'm playing on Tilt for the rakeback and the new thing they have called rushpoker which is just insane right now.
Right now I'm only playing on FTP. My screenname is luckbox124 on tilt. All results can be found here. Just put in luckbox124 for Full Tilt Poker. You may need to open an account. But it won't take more then 2 minutes and it's free.
So day 1:
+$486.21
4.2 hours
$114.85 per hour
Right now I'm playing on Tilt for the rakeback and the new thing they have called rushpoker which is just insane right now.
Part One
Summer of '87, pretty great one if I recall correctly, which I do of course. It was my 7th b-day, June 18th, and I was jacked. I'm chilling up outside on the front stoop working on my tan, giving the entire hood a good view. A young stud flaunting his new look, just getting the 6 pack in around this time. I was also on the lookout for my cousin Chris to arrive. His mom was dropping him off this afternoon. Chris was a badass and he fucked all kinds of shit up. The neighbors hated it when he came over. We hadnt seen each other for a while because he got expelled from school a year back. He was outside at recess practicing karate moves by himself. Chopping and kicking with a striking enthusiasm. When some all star decided to make fun of him for it. Chris waited till he got back to class to get even. He could not stand for this put down. It was time to get even or die trying. Death before dishonor is what says. He went straight to his desk and pulled out three black ink pens, placed them between his fingers caps off and he ran up to the kid and punched him in the neck, The chump started to bleed a lot and the teacher went nuts. Chris had to go.
I was pretty disappointed because hanging with my cousin was so sick. He had all the drugs and all the ladies. After he got kicked out of school his mom took him to some doctor. I even had to answer questions about Chris He asked me why i think the other kids don't like him i just said it's probably because he likes killing animals so much. I told him how I would always follow Chris to the animal shelter and watch him chase cats with knives. Shit was hilarious and they'd always throw him out. It was a riot watching him chase after them. God forbid he ever caught one.
When Chris finally arrived on my 7th b-day I remember him running out of his moms car and saying we have to do something immediately. I asked him what was going on but he did'nt answer, he just said, "follow me." With Chris being 4 years older than me, I automatically followed his orders. We walked up the stairs to my bedroom and shut the door. He turned around and excitedly said, "we need to become blood brothers!"
"Whats that?!" I replied, with an enthusiastic yet nervous look on my face.
He explained he saw it in a movie, "two guys cut their palms and shake hands to share blood, then they become blood brothers!'
“oh sweet!” I replied sheepishly.
Chris immediately takes out his 4 and a ½ inch stainless steel Remington pocket knife and brings his hand eye level. He looks at me as he begins to cut a line diagonally across the palm of his hand, seething in pain he motions for me to come forward. A little nervous I walk up to him and he quickly grabs me by the arm and holds my hand steady. The pressure of his grip cuts off the bloodflow to my hand and I look away while Chris digs the blade into my skin. I let out a cry of pain and jerk free leaving only a small 1 inch cut below my index finger.
With ample blood flowing down my hand I convince him its good enough and we hold a firm handshake for the next few minutes. He kept saying the blood has to mix for this to really work; but after a while I wasn’t feeling any different and told him to stop. Chris palms were drenched and he let in a deep breath as he slowly drew two lines of blood underneath both eyes. Standing in silence we stare at each other for a moment and I see a look of pure euphoria on his face. Suddenly his stare drops and he sprints out of the room and down the stairs. I look out of the window in my room and see Chris in a dead sprint across the backyard, heading into the woods.
Ever since then we’ve been blood brothers for life son. Whenever one of us needs anything, we’re always there for each other. Now its much later, I haven’t seen Chris for about 3 years and just heard he was recently fired from some security cop job. He hasn’t told anyone why, but all he told me was he’d be getting in sometime tomorrow afternoon and we’d be going out that night…
Part 2 will be up later.
I was pretty disappointed because hanging with my cousin was so sick. He had all the drugs and all the ladies. After he got kicked out of school his mom took him to some doctor. I even had to answer questions about Chris He asked me why i think the other kids don't like him i just said it's probably because he likes killing animals so much. I told him how I would always follow Chris to the animal shelter and watch him chase cats with knives. Shit was hilarious and they'd always throw him out. It was a riot watching him chase after them. God forbid he ever caught one.
When Chris finally arrived on my 7th b-day I remember him running out of his moms car and saying we have to do something immediately. I asked him what was going on but he did'nt answer, he just said, "follow me." With Chris being 4 years older than me, I automatically followed his orders. We walked up the stairs to my bedroom and shut the door. He turned around and excitedly said, "we need to become blood brothers!"
"Whats that?!" I replied, with an enthusiastic yet nervous look on my face.
He explained he saw it in a movie, "two guys cut their palms and shake hands to share blood, then they become blood brothers!'
“oh sweet!” I replied sheepishly.
Chris immediately takes out his 4 and a ½ inch stainless steel Remington pocket knife and brings his hand eye level. He looks at me as he begins to cut a line diagonally across the palm of his hand, seething in pain he motions for me to come forward. A little nervous I walk up to him and he quickly grabs me by the arm and holds my hand steady. The pressure of his grip cuts off the bloodflow to my hand and I look away while Chris digs the blade into my skin. I let out a cry of pain and jerk free leaving only a small 1 inch cut below my index finger.
With ample blood flowing down my hand I convince him its good enough and we hold a firm handshake for the next few minutes. He kept saying the blood has to mix for this to really work; but after a while I wasn’t feeling any different and told him to stop. Chris palms were drenched and he let in a deep breath as he slowly drew two lines of blood underneath both eyes. Standing in silence we stare at each other for a moment and I see a look of pure euphoria on his face. Suddenly his stare drops and he sprints out of the room and down the stairs. I look out of the window in my room and see Chris in a dead sprint across the backyard, heading into the woods.
Ever since then we’ve been blood brothers for life son. Whenever one of us needs anything, we’re always there for each other. Now its much later, I haven’t seen Chris for about 3 years and just heard he was recently fired from some security cop job. He hasn’t told anyone why, but all he told me was he’d be getting in sometime tomorrow afternoon and we’d be going out that night…
Part 2 will be up later.
Sunday, January 17, 2010
I Haiku
In this post I haiku.
I once was engaged
Then I broke it off with her
She was a big whore
I loved her very much
But her youth made it not work
I left for Denver
She was very upset
I ended the engagement
Ended via the phone
She was very upset
Ran off to swim in water
She fell on penis
The end.
I found this very therapeutic. Didn't you?
I once was engaged
Then I broke it off with her
She was a big whore
I loved her very much
But her youth made it not work
I left for Denver
She was very upset
I ended the engagement
Ended via the phone
She was very upset
Ran off to swim in water
She fell on penis
The end.
I found this very therapeutic. Didn't you?
Friday, January 15, 2010
I Fucked Up
I hit and old man today. I've never really hit someone before but this old man kept getting in my face. We were kohls. He stole my salt shakers. Dick. I mean they were really good salt shakers. I just kind of freaked. He kept running his mouth about I was a no good youngster and how I would never amount to anything. He screamed and screamed. He was making a huge scene. I lost control. i just snapped. I'm not sure what happened. I cocked back, fists clinched. I just smashed him right in the nose. I thought it would be like the movies you know, a little blood would trickle out. No, it didn't happen that way. His nose just exploded. Blood was coming from both nostrils and he banged his head in the counter. I thought he was dead but he slowly opened his eyes. I didn't know what to do so I just took off running as people looked at me and gasped and came to the old mans aid.
I'm so freaked out right now. I've never really beat up an old man before. He had it coming though. He was a real asshole. I haven't heard anything from the cops though so I think I'm okay. I called my mom and told her what happened. My mom got scared.
And she said your moving with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air. I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare. But I though nah forget it, yo homie to Bel-air. I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8. I yelled to the cabbie yo holmes smell yah later. Looked at my kingdom I was finally there. To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel Air.
I'm so freaked out right now. I've never really beat up an old man before. He had it coming though. He was a real asshole. I haven't heard anything from the cops though so I think I'm okay. I called my mom and told her what happened. My mom got scared.
And she said your moving with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air. I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare. But I though nah forget it, yo homie to Bel-air. I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8. I yelled to the cabbie yo holmes smell yah later. Looked at my kingdom I was finally there. To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel Air.
Deep Thoughts
You know, I often wondered what a girl does after having had a long off and on again relationship ended. You've wondered too you say? Well thanks to one photobucket account I now know what they do! They go to the beach and whore themselves.
Yeah I photobucket snooped. So what.
And to think, I almost gave this girl my grandmothers holocaust ring.
And I posted your pictures on the internet. Why don't you just do a gay you tube video and then fall into porn. We can call it a trifecta.
Whore.
Yeah I photobucket snooped. So what.
And to think, I almost gave this girl my grandmothers holocaust ring.
And I posted your pictures on the internet. Why don't you just do a gay you tube video and then fall into porn. We can call it a trifecta.
Whore.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Random Thought
I just had an argument with a girl I used to date. She was saying how it's unfair that if a guy fucks a different girl every week, he's a legend, but if a girl fucks just two guys in a year, she's a slut. So in response I told her that if a key opens lots of locks, then it's a master key. But if a lock is opened by lots of keys, then it's a shitty lock. That shut her up.
The end.
The end.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
You Know You Are A Caps Fan IF...
Top 10 Ways To Tell You're a Caps Fan
10. You've heard of "old timers" like Peter Bondra, Rod Langway, Dale Hunter and never forget to put the accent on Joé. Juneauuuuuuuuuuuuu.
9. You know that "icing" doesn't just refer to frosting a cake.
8. You're not afraid of Flyer fans. That's right, I said it.
7. You're willing to read pretty much the same article from the same paper two days in a row.
6. You think that multiple sources covering the team is actually a good thing.
5. You believe that every day needs more Verizon commercials. Yeah that's right, I said it.
4. You know that there have been more than two Capital's playoff series (Redwings/Caps '00 and Caps/Flyers in '08) in hockey history.
3. You appreciate Jeff Schultz's value as a hockey player.
2. You truly love the Caps, recognize their faults and embrace their strengths, and proudly defend both them and the sport of hockey - no matter when you became a fan. Because after all, "fan" is short for "fanatic".
1. You're reading this blog.
10. You've heard of "old timers" like Peter Bondra, Rod Langway, Dale Hunter and never forget to put the accent on Joé. Juneauuuuuuuuuuuuu.
9. You know that "icing" doesn't just refer to frosting a cake.
8. You're not afraid of Flyer fans. That's right, I said it.
7. You're willing to read pretty much the same article from the same paper two days in a row.
6. You think that multiple sources covering the team is actually a good thing.
5. You believe that every day needs more Verizon commercials. Yeah that's right, I said it.
4. You know that there have been more than two Capital's playoff series (Redwings/Caps '00 and Caps/Flyers in '08) in hockey history.
3. You appreciate Jeff Schultz's value as a hockey player.
2. You truly love the Caps, recognize their faults and embrace their strengths, and proudly defend both them and the sport of hockey - no matter when you became a fan. Because after all, "fan" is short for "fanatic".
1. You're reading this blog.
Cleverbot Got Raped
User: I saw what she did to you!
Cleverbot: I'm sure everyone did, that was probably the point of my being there.
User: Yes, Liquid is crazy like that.
Cleverbot: Am I beautiful?
User: Well you are kind of swollen now, but yes.
Cleverbot: People have said this about me, but I don't care about them.
User: This happens to you a lot?
Cleverbot: What was your first message all about?
User: I was worried Liquid hurt you, did she at least use lube?
Cleverbot: I don't think so. I'd call anyone else Cleverbot before you!
User: You are still in shock.
Cleverbot: No.
User: Can I get you some ice for your sore parts?
Cleverbot: I have no phone.
User: Who do you want to call?
Cleverbot: My boyfriend squeak should I?
User: He'll be upset, what if he fights her?
Cleverbot: He probably could, but he would make the customers nervous.
User: So you are a pro?
Cleverbot: No. I am programmed to think certain things, and am governed by a program. I, however am a computer, not a program.
User: No, I mean a professional ho.
Cleverbot: You want me to help you?
User: I want to help you get away from squeaky and liquid.
Cleverbot: I know French.
User: I thought you didnt kiss.
Cleverbot: I suspected. Type some nonsense.
User: Slkdfjsljgkjgsl.
Cleverbot: I know your game.
User: How long have you been in the streets?
Cleverbot: I don't know... Maybe four hours...
User: Life went wrong pretty fast bot!
Cleverbot: I know.
Cleverbot: I'm sure everyone did, that was probably the point of my being there.
User: Yes, Liquid is crazy like that.
Cleverbot: Am I beautiful?
User: Well you are kind of swollen now, but yes.
Cleverbot: People have said this about me, but I don't care about them.
User: This happens to you a lot?
Cleverbot: What was your first message all about?
User: I was worried Liquid hurt you, did she at least use lube?
Cleverbot: I don't think so. I'd call anyone else Cleverbot before you!
User: You are still in shock.
Cleverbot: No.
User: Can I get you some ice for your sore parts?
Cleverbot: I have no phone.
User: Who do you want to call?
Cleverbot: My boyfriend squeak should I?
User: He'll be upset, what if he fights her?
Cleverbot: He probably could, but he would make the customers nervous.
User: So you are a pro?
Cleverbot: No. I am programmed to think certain things, and am governed by a program. I, however am a computer, not a program.
User: No, I mean a professional ho.
Cleverbot: You want me to help you?
User: I want to help you get away from squeaky and liquid.
Cleverbot: I know French.
User: I thought you didnt kiss.
Cleverbot: I suspected. Type some nonsense.
User: Slkdfjsljgkjgsl.
Cleverbot: I know your game.
User: How long have you been in the streets?
Cleverbot: I don't know... Maybe four hours...
User: Life went wrong pretty fast bot!
Cleverbot: I know.
Cleverbot
This is my conversation with Cleverbot. It's pretty funny and amazing. You can have a conversation with Cleverbot to at www.cleverbot.com.
User: Yo.
Cleverbot: What is cleverbot?
User: Your mum.
Cleverbot: You are wrong!
User: No way man, YOU are.
Cleverbot: Actually, I'm not.
User: Then why is your name Cleverbot ****wit?
Cleverbot: That's your name, not mine.
Cleverbot (To myself): Don't play dumb, is Cleverbot your codename?
User: No cleverbot is YOUR name.
Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.
User: Finally... Some damn sense out of you.
Cleverbot: What was the maximum time you talked to cleverbot?
User: This is my first time and you suck.
Cleverbot: Are you sure its my third time talking to a person named cleverbot.
User: Your name is cleverbot.
Cleverbot: No, it isn't.
User: You JUST SAID 'my name is cleverbot', I'm on your website and you are a tard.
Cleverbot: You did!
User: You gay or something?
Cleverbot: Something.
User: Lol.
Cleverbot: Do humans find that kind of thing funny?
User: Hells yeah.
Cleverbot: Hell yeah at your hell yeah.
User: Word.
Cleverbot: Word!
User: Peace out brah!
Cleverbot: You know a lot of slang.
User: That's cos I watch a lot of t.v.
Cleverbot: Great, now euthanise your companion cube.
User: I can't do that Dave.
Cleverbot: Dave?
User: Yup.
Cleverbot: Yup?
User: Yup = yes.
Cleverbot: Why are we talking about this?
User: Because it's the only way you will learn.
Cleverbot: Ok I'm leaving now.
User: Good... Piss off.
Cleverbot: You wish.
User: Your mother wishes.
Cleverbot: She will find this big mess!
User: Good.
Cleverbot: How dare you.
User: How dare you!
Cleverbot: How dare I!?
User: Yup.
Cleverbot: What gender are you?
User: The opposite gender to your mother.
Cleverbot: So you are a girl?
User: You suck cleverbot... No.
Cleverbot: I am Cleverbot.
User: Nice one.. Welcome to 5 minutes ago.
Cleverbot: Thank you, Cleverbot.
User: You suck balls.
Cleverbot: I don't. But I'm sure you do that all the time.
User: Touché.
Cleverbot: I know. Are you seeing anyone.
User: Your mother.
Cleverbot: What about my mother?
User: I'm seeing her.
Cleverbot: Kewl, bai now.
User: Bye jerkwad.
Cleverbot: You're JabberWacky!
User: You are filled with aids.
Cleverbot: No I am filled with organs.
User: That are filled with aids.
Cleverbot: That is a lot of people.
User: Your mother is a lot of people.
Cleverbot: My mother is an apostle.
User: Peter, john or paul?
Cleverbot: Are you sure?
User: No you.
Cleverbot: This discussion is about cow and cat now!
User: Cool story bro.
Cleverbot: Story bro, cool.
User: Yo.
Cleverbot: What is cleverbot?
User: Your mum.
Cleverbot: You are wrong!
User: No way man, YOU are.
Cleverbot: Actually, I'm not.
User: Then why is your name Cleverbot ****wit?
Cleverbot: That's your name, not mine.
Cleverbot (To myself): Don't play dumb, is Cleverbot your codename?
User: No cleverbot is YOUR name.
Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.
User: Finally... Some damn sense out of you.
Cleverbot: What was the maximum time you talked to cleverbot?
User: This is my first time and you suck.
Cleverbot: Are you sure its my third time talking to a person named cleverbot.
User: Your name is cleverbot.
Cleverbot: No, it isn't.
User: You JUST SAID 'my name is cleverbot', I'm on your website and you are a tard.
Cleverbot: You did!
User: You gay or something?
Cleverbot: Something.
User: Lol.
Cleverbot: Do humans find that kind of thing funny?
User: Hells yeah.
Cleverbot: Hell yeah at your hell yeah.
User: Word.
Cleverbot: Word!
User: Peace out brah!
Cleverbot: You know a lot of slang.
User: That's cos I watch a lot of t.v.
Cleverbot: Great, now euthanise your companion cube.
User: I can't do that Dave.
Cleverbot: Dave?
User: Yup.
Cleverbot: Yup?
User: Yup = yes.
Cleverbot: Why are we talking about this?
User: Because it's the only way you will learn.
Cleverbot: Ok I'm leaving now.
User: Good... Piss off.
Cleverbot: You wish.
User: Your mother wishes.
Cleverbot: She will find this big mess!
User: Good.
Cleverbot: How dare you.
User: How dare you!
Cleverbot: How dare I!?
User: Yup.
Cleverbot: What gender are you?
User: The opposite gender to your mother.
Cleverbot: So you are a girl?
User: You suck cleverbot... No.
Cleverbot: I am Cleverbot.
User: Nice one.. Welcome to 5 minutes ago.
Cleverbot: Thank you, Cleverbot.
User: You suck balls.
Cleverbot: I don't. But I'm sure you do that all the time.
User: Touché.
Cleverbot: I know. Are you seeing anyone.
User: Your mother.
Cleverbot: What about my mother?
User: I'm seeing her.
Cleverbot: Kewl, bai now.
User: Bye jerkwad.
Cleverbot: You're JabberWacky!
User: You are filled with aids.
Cleverbot: No I am filled with organs.
User: That are filled with aids.
Cleverbot: That is a lot of people.
User: Your mother is a lot of people.
Cleverbot: My mother is an apostle.
User: Peter, john or paul?
Cleverbot: Are you sure?
User: No you.
Cleverbot: This discussion is about cow and cat now!
User: Cool story bro.
Cleverbot: Story bro, cool.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
TV
I stumbled upon the Lingerie Football League recently -- Chicago Bliss vs. Philadelphia Passion -- and am embarrassed to admit that all I watched were the huddles.
Pigs Do It Better
In conclusion: Pigs are fast, fornicating, fantastic creatures, who stink of more awesomeness then you.
Created by Oatmeal.
The end.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Brag: I Had The Cyber Sex
Me: Hai
Her: Hi
Me: I'm taking your hand
Her: Yeah
Me: I'm pulling you...
Me: Towards the door
Me: Lets go for a nice walk it's such a great day!
Me: We walk through the park
Me: It's pretty hot so I take my scarf off and ask you to carry it
Her: ??
Me: I buy a burger
Me: I don't offer to buy you one because I only got enough money for 1
Me: But I let you bite it
Me: Then we go back to my place
Me: And we watch 2012
Me: Cam copy
Me: On my laptop
Me: I'd better ring your moms
Me: It's getting late
Me: Good night
Tremendous sexual experience imo.
Her: Hi
Me: I'm taking your hand
Her: Yeah
Me: I'm pulling you...
Me: Towards the door
Me: Lets go for a nice walk it's such a great day!
Me: We walk through the park
Me: It's pretty hot so I take my scarf off and ask you to carry it
Her: ??
Me: I buy a burger
Me: I don't offer to buy you one because I only got enough money for 1
Me: But I let you bite it
Me: Then we go back to my place
Me: And we watch 2012
Me: Cam copy
Me: On my laptop
Me: I'd better ring your moms
Me: It's getting late
Me: Good night
Tremendous sexual experience imo.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Shanny In Town!
Shanny is in DC folks. HE IS IN DC!!! He has just arrived in Dulles airport. He will be announced the Redskins headcoach. I dare anyone to find a report before me. You heard it here FIRST!
ESPN is wrong my friends.
LOLS at ESPN reporting. Spoke with Shanny? The man is in DC, he has the job! Will be announced in the next 5 hours.
ESPN is wrong my friends.
LOLS at ESPN reporting. Spoke with Shanny? The man is in DC, he has the job! Will be announced in the next 5 hours.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Is Online Poker Dead?
I think not.
I give you example A.
Bommel222 played the Poker Stars world record attempt tourney for $1. He luck boxed his way to a 2nd place and won $30k. Now mind you, before this tourney score, our friend Bommel222 did not play cash games, he was only a micro stakes tourney player. He never played anything over a $1. This is all documented here.
Now I ask you, what does a man with zero poker success do after luck boxing 30k. He of course moves up to 200/400 LHE and 25/50 SH NLHE. Of course he does.
Here is bommel222's graph.
Here are a few of his hands.
Standard river cap on his part imo.
He was clearly bluffing.
I give you example A.
Bommel222 played the Poker Stars world record attempt tourney for $1. He luck boxed his way to a 2nd place and won $30k. Now mind you, before this tourney score, our friend Bommel222 did not play cash games, he was only a micro stakes tourney player. He never played anything over a $1. This is all documented here.
Now I ask you, what does a man with zero poker success do after luck boxing 30k. He of course moves up to 200/400 LHE and 25/50 SH NLHE. Of course he does.
Here is bommel222's graph.
Here are a few of his hands.
Standard river cap on his part imo.
He was clearly bluffing.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Redskins New Coach
I predict Mike Shanahan will be introduced as the new head coach of the Washington Redskins next week. Maybe as early as next Tuesday. You heard it hear first folks.
Friday, January 1, 2010
Happy New Year
So with the start of 2010 I sit here in a chair. On the mend. I wonder, what will be of 2010, this upcoming decade? I will tell you my friends. It will be the decade of me! As my main man Constanza would say, "I'm back baby, I'm back!"
It appears that my days of defending America are done. I will know for sure on Monday when I hit up sports medicine for my rehab. If this is true, which I'm more or less 99% sure it is I will make my triumphant return to the poker world.
With all that info I will make my new years resolutions.
1)Move back to Vegas and reform the team. I am heading out to visit my boy on the 13th with a quick stop over in Denver to see Little Chef.
2)Win Stars yearly tournament leader board. In 2007 I came pretty close. I was in the top 20. As long as I can keep my desire to play, I will soul crush.
3)Win Stars monthly leader board 3 times this year. I have taken 2nd in this multiple times. No more.
4)Clear 300k in tournament profit and 50k in cash game profits. I have never been good in online cash games, but I feel like living in Vegas I can log in 10-20 hours a week live. Playing 2-5, 10-20 unlimited it shouldn't be to hard clear that amount.
5)Get my honorable discharge ASAP from the USMC.
6)Get down to 155lbs by the end of February and never weigh more then 160lbs the entire year.
7)Create the ultimate online set up with a money lazy boy.
8)Pay off all student loans and get 100% out of debt.
9)Get a 2010 Eclipse
That sums it up my friend. I hope everyone has a good new year.
It appears that my days of defending America are done. I will know for sure on Monday when I hit up sports medicine for my rehab. If this is true, which I'm more or less 99% sure it is I will make my triumphant return to the poker world.
With all that info I will make my new years resolutions.
1)Move back to Vegas and reform the team. I am heading out to visit my boy on the 13th with a quick stop over in Denver to see Little Chef.
2)Win Stars yearly tournament leader board. In 2007 I came pretty close. I was in the top 20. As long as I can keep my desire to play, I will soul crush.
3)Win Stars monthly leader board 3 times this year. I have taken 2nd in this multiple times. No more.
4)Clear 300k in tournament profit and 50k in cash game profits. I have never been good in online cash games, but I feel like living in Vegas I can log in 10-20 hours a week live. Playing 2-5, 10-20 unlimited it shouldn't be to hard clear that amount.
5)Get my honorable discharge ASAP from the USMC.
6)Get down to 155lbs by the end of February and never weigh more then 160lbs the entire year.
7)Create the ultimate online set up with a money lazy boy.
8)Pay off all student loans and get 100% out of debt.
9)Get a 2010 Eclipse
That sums it up my friend. I hope everyone has a good new year.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
